CCCE- I Do What the Voices Tell Me

This is the first piece of Crazy Christian mail I’ve gotten in my personal inbox in a while. And it’s special.

This will give you the chills……..GOOD chills.

A young man had been to Wednesday night Bible Study.

The Pastor had shared about listening to God and obeying the Lord’s voice.

The young man couldn’t help but wonder, “Does God still speak to people?”

After service he went out with some friends for coffee and pie and they discussed the message.
Several different ones talked about how God had led them in different ways.

It was about ten o’clock when the young man started driving home. Sitting in his car, he just began to pray, “God…If you still speak to
people speak to me. I will listen. I will do my best to obey.”

As he drove down the main street of his town, he had the strangest thought to stop and buy a gallon of milk.

He shook his head and said out loud, “God is that you?” He didn’t get a reply and started on toward home.

But again, the thought, buy a gallon of milk.

The young man thought about Samuel and how he didn’t recognize the voice of God, and how little Samuel ran to Eli.

“Okay, God, in case that is you, I will buy the milk.” It didn’t seem like too hard a test of obedience. He could always use the milk. He stopped and purchased the gallon of milk and started off toward home.

As he passed Seventh Street, he again felt the urge, “Turn Down that street.”

This is crazy he thought and drove on past the intersection.

Again, he felt that he should turn down Seventh Street .

At the next intersection, he turned back and headed down Seventh.

Half jokingly, he said out loud, “Okay, God, I will”.

He drove several blocks, when suddenly, he felt like he should stop. He pulled over to the curb and looked around. He was in semi commercial area of town. It wasn’t the best but it wasn’t the worst of neighborhoods either. The businesses were closed and most of the houses looked dark like the people were already in bed.

Again, he sensed something, “Go and give the milk to the people in the house across the street.” The young man looked at the house. It was dark and it looked like the people were either gone or they were already asleep. He started to open the door and then sat back in the car seat.

“Lord, this is insane. Those people are asleep and if I wake them up, they are going to be mad and I will look stupid.” Again, he felt like he should go and give the milk.

Finally, he opened the door, “Okay God, if this is you, I will go to the door and I will give them the milk. If you want me to look like a crazy person, okay. I want to be obedient. I guess that will count for something but if they don’t answer right away, I am out of here.”

He walked across the street and rang the bell. He could hear some noise inside. A man’s voice yelled out, “Who is it? What do you want?” Then the door opened before the young man could get away.

The man was standing there in his jeans and T-shirt. He looked like he

just got out of bed. He had a strange look on his face and he didn’t seem too happy to have some stranger standing on his doorstep. “What is it?”

The young man thrust out the gallon of milk, “Here, I brought this to you.”
The man took the milk and rushed down a hallway.

Then from down the hall came a woman carrying the milk toward the kitchen.
The man was following her holding a baby. The baby was crying. The man had tears streaming down his face.

The man began speaking and half crying, “We were just praying. We had some big bills this month and we ran out of money. We didn’t have any milk for our baby. I was just praying and asking God to show me how to get some milk.”

His wife in the kitchen yelled out, “I ask him to send an Angel with some.
Are you an Angel?”

The young man reached into his wallet and pulled out all the money he had on him and put in the man’s hand. He turned and walked back toward his car and the tears were streaming down his face.

He knew that God still answers prayers.

THIS IS A SIMPLE TEST….? If you believe that God is alive and well, send this to at least ten people and the person that sent it to you!!!!!!!!
This is so true. Sometimes it’s the simplest things that God asks us to do that cause us, if we are obedient to what He’s asking, to be able to hear. His voice more clear than ever. Please listen, and obey! It will bless you (and the world). Phil 4:13. This is an easy test, you score 100 or zero. It’s your choice.

If you aren’t ashamed to do this, please follow the directions. Jesus said, “If you are ashamed of me, I will be ashamed of you before my Father.”

Not ashamed Pass this on

As an aside, the original had a spiral notebook graphic on the left side, but I’m feeling too lazy to investigate how that was done and reproduce it. Let’s make fun of this stuff:

The man was standing there in his jeans and T-shirt. He looked like he
just got out of bed.

Oh, those crazy people in semi-commercial neighborhoods! Always sleeping in their jeans.

The man began speaking and half crying, “We were just praying. We had some big bills this month and we ran out of money. We didn’t have any milk for our baby. I was just praying and asking God to show me how to get some milk.”

I don’t want to sound like some La Leche League crazy person, but fake lady, I can tell you how you can have milk for your fake baby for free. Plus, babies shouldn’t have cow’s milk until they’re a year old. If this imaginary baby is old enough to drink cow’s milk, it’s old enough to not have to.

This is so true. Sometimes it’s the simplest things that God asks us to do that cause us, if we are obedient to what He’s asking, to be able to hear.

I don’t think going to a store, buying a gallon of milk, driving into a neighborhood you don’t know, going to a complete stranger’s house and giving them the milk qualifies as “simple.” That’s a lot of steps. And I’m not sure about the first sentence. Is it “this is so true,” like “That happens all the time,” or is it “this is so true,” and if you don’t believe me you’re a stupidhead and I hate you?

If you aren’t ashamed to do this, please follow the directions. Jesus said, “If you are ashamed of me, I will be ashamed of you before my Father.”

Do people have to put this in every email they write? I realize that religion operates pretty heavily on guilt, but give it a rest. Hey, new scoring item!

Let’s score this bad boy:

Helping Those Who Can’t Figure Out How to Help Themselves
I don’t know about these people, but I make sure I can eat before I pay the rest of my bills, and I don’t even have a baby. I imagine if I did have kids, I’d make sure they were fed before, and possibly instead of, paying as many of my bills as necessary.

Pass This Along- If You Aren’t Ashamed

Attempting to promote religion through the use of analogy/metaphor/simile that makes it look unappealing to those outside the religion
Where I come from, people who hear a voice they think is a god and do what that voice tells them to do go for psych evals.

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6 Responses to CCCE- I Do What the Voices Tell Me

  1. stella says:

    So, am I the only one thinking this guy was going to find someone on a corner eating a chocolate chip cookie? Now, that’s real need.

  2. […] blogs, but that’s now going to change.   Crazy Christian Chain Emails has a great post up here, that you all can read and enjoy.  As a preview: what do you get when you […]

  3. rev marvin e purser jr says:

    Narcissism

  4. Jim Cowan says:

    Holy cow !

  5. Green Jeans says:

    First, I agree that the story sounds completely made up. No name, no date, no city, no references.

    Second, the “pass it on” at the end is also the hallmark of a prank email.

    But…

    1. Maybe the guy put on jeans after getting out of bed, so he wouldn’t have to answer the door in his underwear.

    2. Maybe the baby was 13 months old, and the mother had stopped producing milk. I don’t know the official age at which you stop calling a baby a baby, but I think at least up to 18 months.

    I think the reason “glurges” like that get passed along is because a lot of people, especially Christians, do believe in inspiration. Many people “get a feeling” to do something, and it turns out beneficial.

    Snopes has a good definition of a “glurge.”
    http://www.snopes.com/glurge/glurge.asp

  6. scrounge pup says:

    Received the “Got Milk?” CCCE from an aunt. As I was reading it in Gmail, I noticed an ad for an “Exorcist Bed” along the right side. Wonderful. I may send her one. That time of year you know.

    It makes me wonder, “Is God trying to tell (sell) me something?” Hmm. Can’t be coincidence, can it, Lord?

    http://www.mooncostumes.com/item/3609?ref=google2&gclid=CPuIx5K8qo8CFRGoGgodLlW9SQ

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